Now here's an idea worth thinking about!
The
Mighty Mur Lafferty recently
wondered aloud what things might not be specifically prohibited by deed restrictions. Her post focused specifically on defensive fortifications, specifically a moat. Nothing says she can't have one, as long as her drawbridge matches the color of her house. That's all fine and good (and a moat would be awesome, especially if filled with something flammable, or acid, or better still, a flammable acid), but medieval defense is only going going to take you so far.
This leads right into something I've been thinking of doing for some time. I want to build a siege engine in my back yard. I'm pretty sure nothing in our city ordinances explicitly says I can't (here in the City of the Village, Oklahoma, we don't have a neighborhood association; our city council fills that void nicely). And it could do double duty as an attractive flower trellis, until the time came to use it.
I'm certain it would fill my neighbors with fear, too, which is always a good thing. I can easily imagine talking with the guy next door over the fence:
"What's that you're building there," he'd ask me, eying my pile of fresh pressure-treated lumber.
"It's a
trebuchet, my good man," I would reply. "A siege engine capable of hurling hundreds of pounds of rock or cholera-infected human heads great distances to rain destruction down upon my enemies."
He would then give me that look I've come to expect from the good people of the Village, the one that indicates I am the crazy old man everyone's more than a little afraid of. The guy whose lawn the neighborhood kids dare each other to step on. He wouldn't believe me right away, but he'd come around once civilization falls (and the fear-mongering news media assures me it will, most likely because of games like Grand Theft Auto IV) and I used my siege engine to declare myself King of the Village (and Nichols Hills for good measure).
Now I need to run along and get myself a good set of plans to work from. While I'm at it, I'll go ahead and move forward with my plans to genetically engineer
dogs with bees in their mouths so when they bark they shoot bees at you.
Mur, of course, should be absolved of all responsibility for my plans (unless I succeed, at which point I will name her my royal advisor in charge of ideas and present her with a
half-pony half monkey monster in appreciation). Her
News from Poughkeepsie segments are wonderful creative ideas she's posting free for any creative types to take and run with. All she asks is a link back to the post that inspired you; and I'll be sure to carve the URL into the side of my trebuchet when I'm done.
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